Loneliness is a feeling that nobody is on your side. The feeling that despite standing in a room full of people, your existence seems invisible. In fact, loneliness has been referred to as a global epidemic by the WHO (World Health Organization) indicating it can be as bad for people’s health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day. American psychiatrist Robert Waldinger says, “Loneliness kills. It’s as powerful as smoking or alcoholism.” Waldinger leads the Harvard happiness study[1] , the longest scientific study of happiness ever conducted.
Loneliness is a feeling that nobody is on your side. The feeling that despite standing in a room full of people, your existence seems invisible.
In fact, loneliness has been referred to as a global epidemic by the WHO (World Health Organization) indicating it can be as bad for people’s health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day. American psychiatrist Robert Waldinger says, “Loneliness kills. It’s as powerful as smoking or alcoholism.” Waldinger leads the Harvard happiness study[1] , the longest scientific study of happiness ever conducted.
A great example is Lee Jian from the K-Drama “My Mister”. Jian’s disillusionment reflects her loneliness early on in the drama. Portrayed brilliantly by IU, Jian is a typical office outcast, minding her own business since her colleagues don’t really seem to notice her existence.
We can assume she’s experienced loneliness for a while. She’s been on her own caring for her deaf grandmother, her only living relative. Even at the young age of 21, she shows strong distrust in people to the extent that even when some people including Park Dong Hoon (male protagonist) made efforts in getting to know her, she missed the signs, rejecting them completely, unsure of how to interact. Jian’s demeanor throughout most of ‘My Mister’ may have been the epitome of loneliness.
Remember that loneliness is not necessarily experienced only by a person without friends or family or lack of community. Having the gift of companionship like friends, family or a significant other might seem like the opposite of loneliness, but we can be lonely even when surrounded by a sea of people who love us. Couples share they can feel lonely in their relationships when they feel their partner doesn’t understand how to support them. It also doesn’t matter whether you’re an introvert or extrovert. Extroverts indicate they can feel very lonely when they believe that nobody is on their side.
No one is immune to loneliness.
FAQs
Yes, the WHO officially recognized it as a global public health priority, estimating that around one in six people worldwide experience loneliness, contributing to hundreds of thousands of deaths each year. The U.S. Surgeon General made a similar declaration in 2023, and research shows chronic loneliness carries mortality risks comparable to smoking 15 cigarettes a day.
Harvard’s Study of Adult Development, the longest-running study on happiness ever conducted, found that the quality of our relationships is the strongest predictor of long-term happiness and healthy aging, more than wealth, fame, or career success. It’s the research that led psychiatrist Robert Waldinger to describe loneliness as being as damaging to health as smoking or alcoholism.
Younger people are actually among the hardest hit, with research showing 17-21% of people aged 13-29 report feeling lonely, and rates are highest among teenagers specifically. Some studies point to rising smartphone and internet use as a contributing factor, though researchers stop short of calling it a direct cause.
Loneliness isn’t only about being physically alone, it can show up as feeling misunderstood or unsupported by the very people close to you, including a partner. My Mister illustrates this well through Lee Jian’s character, whose isolation runs deep despite the people occasionally trying to reach her, showing loneliness is more about connection quality than company itself.
